Ancient of Days

My new favorite name for God is “Ancient of Days”.  Am I allowed to have favorite names for God or is that sacrilegious.  Are all His names perfectly holy and I have to like them all the same?  If so, I’m doomed but right now the title Ancient of Days captures the way I am learning to see God perfectly.

Way, way, way back in the day, we sang this song in church called “Ancient of Days”, but the song had no bearing on the name any more than if we’d used the word Jesus or God or any of His other names; it just happened to be metrically pleasing.  But the significance of this name has hit me strongly as I write a paper that has consumed my life for the past three months.

My paper is not about God.  I am writing it for a rhetoric and drama class in which we studied Shakespeare, but my blessed, wonderful professor allowed us to write our papers on anything that interested us, provided it tied back to the class somehow, and I chose That Hideous Strength, by C.S. Lewis.  There are a million things to be said about this fantastic book (the third in his Space Trilogy), but because specificity becomes more important as you progress in your education, I had to focus on a specific area and I chose the use of Arthurian legend.

Because I have written a 15 page paper about this and am tired of picking apart the details of the story, I refuse to give you a summary of the plot other than this: It’s about this evil corporation that is trying to take over the world and this small group of people on the other side trying, with the help of King Arthur’s spiritual heir and Merlin, to stop them.  Does that sound confusing?  I hope I haven’t ruined the whole book for you and now you won’t read it. GO READ IT.   

In working so heavily with both the concept of myth and the writings of Lewis, however, I have learned a great deal about Christ.  The Arthurian legend is filled with Christian symbolism (Arthur as a messianic figure uniting a torn country under the banner of Christ, for instance) and mythology (Holy Grail, anyone?), and Lewis turns this to advantage in his very modern, fairly sci-fi novel.  The idea behind myth, for him, is that it is great on its own, regardless of the manner of telling, because it contains a glimpse of reality.  That reality is defined by Christ and all good myths contain this critical, beautiful undertow back to Christ.  Throughout the Arthurian mythology, you see the constant current of symbolism and the Gospel.  In fact, these under-pinnings in Christianity are by no means limited to “Christian mythology”.  They are universal.

A myth is universal and timeless. Lewis translates the Arthurian legend into a modern setting to demonstrate what a powerful pull on our hearts these heroic legends have, and his point is that they have this pull because they lead to God and we are wired to need God.

The awe we have of Arthur, the once and future king (to borrow the apt wording of T.H. White), is an awe that God deserves.  The story of Christ is myth, but it is myth fulfilled.  The legend of the “dying god” is pervasive throughout history but only in Christ is it realized as history.  By becoming reality, the story does not lose its mythic qualities.  The myth gains the status of truth that is venerable.

Tolkien, in describing fairy-tales, talks about the “eucastastrophe” that is necessary for a good fairy-story, the perfect and near-impossible “happy ending”, but Tolkien carries the analogy to the Gospel, saying, “ But this story has entered History and the primary world; the desire and aspiration of sub-creation had been raised to the fulfilment [sic] of Creation. The Birth of Christ is the eucatastrophe of Man’s history.  The Resurrection is the eucatastrophe of the story of the Incarnation.  This story begins and ends in joy” (On Fairy Stories 65).  

As I read the Bible, I realize this is true.  The stories we were awed by as children but read as rote now that we’re grown regain (with the added fire maturity and greater comprehension brings) their original awe-factor.  God is not just some “being” in the sky with all sorts of power and knowledge.  Jesus is not a cool historical figure like George Washington.  Jesus is Immanuel (God with us!  Think about THAT for a moment), the myth of the dying god realized in infant, child and man form, and God is the Ancient of Days, the undying, unchanging, awe-ful (in the archaic sense) I AM.

Relationships (Religion is Stupid)

Guys, here’s the deal. Religions are stupid. Any idiot can come up with Religion. Case in point:

Behold! I, Ben Michaels, have been appointed as the Great Prophet for the Grand Poo-Bah, who farted the earth into existence before time began. This appointment occurred during my quest for a bathroom in the electronics section of Wal-Mart. The electronics section is in the back; however, I had been blinded to the fact that Wal-Mart’s bathrooms are located in the front of the building. Now it came to pass that, while I was searching in vain, I stumbled into the employee break room at Wal-Mart. Lo and behold, a Great Spirit emanating from the toaster oven spoke these words to me:
“It is I, the Grand Poo-Bah, who farted the earth into existence and who has been screwing over mankind since time began. Tremble in fear, mortal, and mess your hosiery, for I have chosen you to be my Prophet to peoples of this earth.”
And I looked, and there before me a vision of the afterlife appeared. I saw individuals of the past all living and working in a great Wal-Mart in the sky for eternity. I saw John D. Rockefeller as front line manager, while Mother Theresa stocked the frozen foods section. The toaster oven spoke again:
“This is what happens to all who die on this earth. I have too many employees stocking feminine articles and frozen foods. Clearly, these mortals on earth do not understand how to live their lives in order to improve their rank in the next life. That is why I have chosen you, Ben Michaels, as my Prophet. You are to give these 10 Precepts to the world and they are to obey, or risk stocking feminine articles for eternity. Thus speaketh I, and thus I have spoken.”
The 10 Precepts were as follows:
1. Dishonest gain is the only gain. Swindle everyone. Fraud will get you management in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky.
2. Speed up for creatures. Cats are worth 10 points. Little old ladies are worth 50 points. Hitting your mom guarantees salvation.
3. Never, under any circumstances, use the toaster oven in the Wal-Mart break room. Doing so will result in instant condemnation to the feminine articles section in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky.
4. Your rank in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky is determined by your obedience to the Precepts, your ponderings of the Naoks, and how much your hair resembles Donald Trump’s.
5. Bald males are condemned to stocking the feminine articles in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky. If they are good, they can stock frozen food. This can all be avoided if they wear a toupee in this life.
6. You must be slightly more fanatical then Mormans. Crusades, going door-to-door, and pondering the Naoks are strongly encouraged.
7. Deodorant is the spawn of evil. Shun it. Avoid silverware, as well.
8. Screw over as many people in this life. The more people you screw over, the more people you’ll rule over in the next life.
9. Homeschoolers are the metaphorical Jedi of this life. In the next life, they’ll be actual Jedi.
10. If you seek guidance from the Grand Poo-Bah, he will give you revelations if you stare at the milk left over from Cinnamon Toast Crunch long enough.
In order to open our conciseness to an awareness of the Grand Poo-Bah, I have been given the following 11 Naoks, which are simple questions and concepts. Pondering these will open your mind to an awareness of the Grand Poo-Bah. This will aid your rank in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky.

The 11 Naoks are as follows:
1. When does the armadillo excrement become The Fragrance?
2. Can your ride the donkey before you quash the volcano?
3. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
4. How many college students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
5. Your mom.
6. If the water is cold, can you clean the white board?
7. How are English muffins, muffins?
8. Chuck Norris.
9. How many boards could the Mongols hoard if the Mongol Hordes got bored?
10. What would you do if you were locked in a room with a Buddhist monk and a meat tenderizer?
11. The word, “cereal,” when repeated over and over again.

By following the Precepts and developing an awareness of the Grand Poo-Bah by pondering the Naoks, you will attain a job paying higher than minimum wage in the Great Wal-Mart in the Sky. All this has been revealed to me, Ben Michaels, the Great Prophet, appointed by the Grand Poo-Bah who farted the world into existence. Thus speaketh I, and thus I have spoken.

There. I’m done. I guess that’s why I’m glad I don’t follow a religion. Christianity isn’t about rules, rituals, or steps to get your free ticket into heaven. It’s about a relationship with Jesus. Getting to know him any way we can in this life. And that beats any religion.

Study Hard (Becoming a Nerd)

“This college will turn you into such a nerd.” Jon chuckled, while nodding sagely. Everyone in my life group chuckled nervously in response and looked at him with questioning looks.
“Like, when I got my text books I was like, “Yes! New text books!” He told us, trying to explain life at Christian college to a bunch of freshmen, who are really just high schoolers in disguise. We clearly just didn’t understand because he just threw his hands up, smiled, and said, “You’ll find out.”

Today was the first day of classes here at Ozark Christian College. Up til now it’s felt like 4th grade camp. Teary-eyed parents wondering if I’ll be ok. Crazy friends made and bonded with in 24 hours. Spiritual counselors (life group leaders). Cabin counselors (RAs). Running around playing crazy games, learning rules, and listening to bible lessons.

But today, on the first day of class, I’ve learned why it’s not camp. You have to work. Hard. Papers are long and frequent. Memorizing large sections of scripture is required. Reading is long and, sometimes, pretty dry.

But I love it. Even after the first day, I love it all. Everyone does. Not just nerds, or kids on fire for God, or wiz kids. Everyone is immersed in their homework. We can’t wait to study. We love our school. We’ve become nerds.

Probably because all of realize something. We’re all studying the Bible. So if there’s one thing in which to immerse yourself, one thing worth being nerdy about, one thing to study until it comes out your ears, it’s this. The Bible is beautiful. It’s true. It never changes. It’s meaningful. It’s the only text book on the planet with any meaning and truth to it. More so than science, music, or math.

So yeah. We’re nerds. We’re studying hard. We’re getting nothing short of A’s. We’re not going to procrastinate. We’re gonna study from noon to 9 most days. We’re gonna work ahead. We’re gonna over-achieve. It’s worth it.

This is school.

This is the Bible.

This is Christian College.

Christmas Vs. Easter (A Match Made in Heaven)

It's THAT year. I don't know how this idea of THAT year started, but it's THAT year. It's a bittersweet concept. See, THAT year is when we have our huge family reunion at Christmas time. I don't know about your family, but when my extended family gets together it's the most awesome, stressful, fun, crazy, disappointing time that can be crammed into a week and a half. Obviously, not every year is THAT year. Our family is pretty spread out around the country so THAT year only happens every two or three years or so. On off years, it's really just me, my mom and dad, and my siblings and maybe that awesome aunt and uncle that come in from California just to see us. On off years, we have our own little traditions. We read the same book during December, we have our own little Christmas eve celebration, our own decorations, our own tree, and our own order to how Christmas day goes. It's great.

But it's THAT year. All our traditions and things we love about Christmas are thrown out the window in a whirlwind of aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, bickering, laughter, game nights, home cooked meals, and grandma's pie.

So which one do I prefer? I don't know. I know what's gonna happen on the off years. I like it. But anything goes on THAT year. That's what makes THAT year so bittersweet.

I guess everyone has their own image of Christmas. How it should be. Snow. Mistletoe. Carols. Family. Food. Presents. Lights. Everyone loves Christmas. It, literally, is the highlight of the year. The best movies come out at that time. Stores around the country that have been in the red all year suddenly see their sales spike. The whole country is just a happier, merrier place. Everyone knows what happens on December 25th and gets excited about it. Even the grinches.

This is where you punch your computer screen in because now I've gotten you in the Christmas spirit in mid-August. Sorry about that. Christmas is the highlight of the year.

But what about Easter?

See. Easter is nothing compared to Christmas. It's kinda of a letdown, actually. On Christmas, you get presents and everyone's warm and fuzzy and cozy. Easter, however, is really the only day you HAVE to go to Church without risking losing all your Christian points (You get a "get out of church free" card at Christmas, though). Maybe you get a couple chocolates in a basket (that is, if you follow that demonic cult called the Easter Bunny). Whoop-dee-doo.


You get the same amount of chocolates in your Christmas stocking and that doesn't even include the presents. And that's holy chocolate. Jesus gives you chocolate at Christmas. If you get an egg or chocolate at Easter, though, that's Demon-spawn.

Now, we're all Christians here. We know the true meaning of Christmas and Easter (HINT: Santa and the Easter Bunny are NOT involved). So isn't Easter just as, if not more, significant as Christmas?

So what gives? Why is Christmas so much more fun than Easter?

I don't know for sure, but I can't help but think that we enjoy Christmas more because of the presents and "spirit" and commercialization. But that's just me.

I guess the key is that Christmas and Easter are equally significant. Ultimately, they don't mean squat without the other. They're inextricably linked. It's like they're married. They're both are the happiest times of the year. We should remember that.

So enjoy your Christmas. I'm going to. It is, after all, THAT year. Unto us a Savior is born.

And enjoy your Easter, too. He is Risen. It's party time.

So Merry Christmas! And Happy Easter!

Living in the Future

So with my impending nuptials and finals for school, you can imagine I have been pretty swamped.  It's like I'm a speeding bullet aimed towards this one point in time: the wedding.  Everything that happens at the house, almost everything I talk about, everything I think and do are all aimed toward that goal.  One of the things I thought as I drove home for probably the last time that I could call it that was how much I wanted to live in each moment and enjoy my last moments as my mom and dad's little girl.  But each moment instead focuses on the moment when I become a Mrs., take a new name and find a new home with my husband.

When does this forward living stop?  When we are young all we think about is being a "grown-up".  We are always asked what we want to be and do.  In high school we think about college, in college we think about our career.  Right now I move toward my wedding, then people will start asking about kids and then when we do have kids, everybody will want to know what our kids are going to do and then when the kids are gone, when retirement will happen.  For a world of trite sayings on cutesy wall plaques stating that life is a journey and to stop and smell the roses and live in the moment, every single person seems to push us forward onto whatever is the next thing.  It can be extremely stressful, like when people ask me what I want to do with my degree.  I don't know!  How am I supposed to know?  I majored in a Liberal Arts field!  There is NOTHING to do!

This constant living in the future is difficult, taxing and unBiblical.  "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34)  

"Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.”  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”" (James 4:13-15)  

People are predicting Jesus will come back May 21.  I don't really think it's very likely.  But I don't know what will happen tomorrow, like James says.  We are called to live for Christ, one step at a time.  So yes, my man and I can talk about baby names and where we would like to live someday and what we want in a house and things like that.  But the only real thing worth doing is living for Christ right here and right now.  Hopefully I can remember that these next few weeks and the rest of my life.  Tomorrow will care for itself, and if it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that.

Sarah 

Double Takes (A Day in the Life)

So have you ever had a double take while reading the Bible? Like a “whoa, THAT just happened. In the Bible. It JUST said that.” You’re so taken aback by this unexpectedly simple piece of narration that you have to read it twice. It’s like it makes sense. Like it’s well-written.


This happens to me every time I crack open the Good Book. Probably because I don’t read it nearly as often as I should. And by read, I mean read. I went (am going) through a phase where I studied the Bible in minute detail. I’m a Bible Bowler AND an Awana alumni. I could quote 1 and 2 Timothy and Titus for you. I do not need my table of contents to look up Nahum 2:4. I know where it is. You could say I know my Bible really well. I studied it. I’ve earned scholarships to Christian colleges because I know it so well. But I’ve never read it very much.


Lately, however, it’s been different. It makes me sound like an old person, but I HAVE to read something before I go to sleep. Generally, it’s some dumb novel that I’ve grabbed off the shelf. But I’ve run out of dumb novels to grab off the shelf. So, I’ve started reading my Bible. Like it's a novel. Because that’s what it is. A story. Of epic proportions. I’ve realized how much we miss when we focus only on books and chapters and verses and headers.


It’s well written. It’s ordinary writing about extraordinary events. There’s a human element to it.


Even the New Testament letters are interesting when you hear about all the names and people and then relate them to Acts. I love the portion in Acts during the riot in Ephesus where it says, “The assembly was in confusion: Some were shouting one thing, some were shouting another. Most of the people did not even know why they were there.”

This isn’t a crowd of evil no-gooders who hate Jesus and love Satan. This is just a crowd of people. Ordinary people who are swept up in the mob mentality.


Or, in Genesis, you can hear the sarcasm when Joseph’s brothers see him in the distance and say, “Here comes that dreamer!”


But what really hit me as I read the Bible recently is Matthew 14. You look at the headers and you see three, seemingly unrelated, unconnected, stories: John the Baptist is beheaded, Jesus feeds the 5,000, and Jesus walks on water. But they’re not unrelated at all. Matthew certainly didn’t write it that way.


We miss a lot when we jump from header to header while we study and not read.


There are two, key verses here that you would never read together because they’re separated by a header that some editor made up. “And John the Baptist’s disciples came and took John’s body and buried it. Then they went and told Jesus. When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place.”


See? Doesn’t that read better? Transitions!


It goes on. “Hearing of this, the crowds followed Jesus on foot from the towns.”


They followed Jesus! Of all the nerve! I mean, c’mon. Jesus just lost his cousin. His ally. Because of a whim of Herod. Jesus wants some alone time. But the crowds follow him! So when Jesus gets off his boat to get some serious quiet time, he sees a crowd of people waiting for him. They want him to teach them. Again. They want him to heal Grandma’s gout. Again. C’mon! Can’t they see that Jesus has problems of his own? If there was a time for Jesus to snap, this is it. But does he shout, “Go away! I’m sick of all your little problems!’?


No! It says, “When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, he had compassion on them and healed their sick.”


He even fed them. Everyone.


Then, finally, after they’re fed and the disciples are sent off on the boat, Jesus can have his quiet time. That was, after all, the idea. But it gets better.

It’s windy. The disciples in the boat aren’t going anywhere fast. So even with their head start, Jesus is able to catch up with them.

By walking on water.

A day in the life of Jesus.

What have YOU read in the bible lately?

I am Eve

I identify a lot with Eve. When I hear a pastor talk about her, I perk up as though they are talking about me. Ultimately I feel as though they are really and truly telling my story when they tell hers. If somebody speaks ill of Eve, I bristle like they've insulted me and would defend her as readily as I'd defend myself--because in my mind I am her.

Her ultimate sin is the same as mine--pride. She wanted to be like God. She wanted to be wise, she wanted answers. It seemed to her there was no obvious reason she shouldn't have them. The act of defiance, the first sin, was an assertion of independence from God, though ultimately the act of enslavement to sin, a far worse master.

I think at the heart of things I must simply be Eve all over again.

The original sinner, you understand?

I want answers. I want knowledge. It's suffocation just being a piece in God's greater puzzle when I want to see the bigger picture. I don't want to be in a role blindly, not knowing what effect I will have on the greater story. Like Eve, I am naïve and susceptible to lies. A child of that Mother of All People, the Dawn of the Human Race, I was born fallen and confused, incapable of separating lies from the Truth. In my childness, I am prey to every serpent that crosses my path. My heart is tumultuously torn from love to love, till each new passion means nothing and the great power of my emotions (once a perfect gift of a fiery God) is valueless. I have traded love of God for love of self, and love of service (that service for which I was created) for love of domination, which sometimes masquerades under the stolen title of "Freedom".

Ultimately the only thing that separates me from Eve is Jesus.

--Sarah